Need and Love.

I need you.
I NEED you.
I cannot always tell you this, but
I need you.
Because you are my friend and
you are beautiful and understand me
in a secret way I never expected.
I WANT to tell you this, but
I don't want you to misunderstand.
I do not want you to be my crutch,
that isn't what I mean by need.
I just need you,
to never leave me, never go out of my life.
never stop loving me.
I want to be near you,
to touch you, but
touches frighten me so much.
I'm not there yet, but I'm trying.
I'm getting there, with my words,
opening myself more, telling more of myself.

I cant keep being a stone.
It seemed easy to be a stone and
keep everyone out, but
it gets lonely and I need you too much
to be a stone with you.
I think of you all the time.
I love you, even though I never see you nearly enough
(or at all)
how did I come to have you at all? That doesn't matter.
you are mine and I love you.