AN OPEN LETTER

time and time again you pushed me away, but always i let you back. i believed you each time you said you missed me. i believed you every time you said sorry, and i always welcomed you back without even a second thought.
i never had a problem letting you back in, because you had always been what i thought to be, an honest person. you were forthcoming and i respected that about you.

this time, you chose to be deceitful, this time i gave you the opportunity to be honest with me, just like every single other time, i even went out on a limb telling you even more about just how deeply i feel for you. and you made the conscious choice to lie, changing everything about us. and making me wonder if everything i thought about you was in fact based upon a lie. perhaps you were never honest, never sorry. and never missed me at all, only knew, that i would still be there like always waiting for you to come back.

if you had EVER respected me as a person at all, you would have been honest and less cruel in the manner in which you chose to break my heart, i guess i was just a joke to you. never someone to take serious or care for or love, not even to love as a friend. you lied when you said you valued my friendship, words that i had cherished very deeply.

now i will always wonder just what the point of any of this was. i can only assume i was just someone to use and entertain yourself with until someone you'd actually want to be with, came along. it never mattered to you how i would feel.

you have succeeded in making me feel smaller than anyone ever has before. because despite everything i had always believed you liked me for me, and supported me as a person and were in my corner. now i know all your kind supportive encouraging and positive words were just lies to keep me hanging on. and i wonder how i will ever be able to believe anyone again. i can't say i have any reason to believe there is any truth in this world.

i did so love you more than you could possibly fathom. and that being said, i can only hope the choices you've made are the ones that will make you truly happy.

you broke my heart and this time i know you're not coming back.