The Shitty Handshake

The handshake is a very important aspect of a first impression. When meeting someone your "handshake should express that you're happy to meet the other person, rather than giving the impression that you are apathetic or that you want to dominate their hand," as stated by confident hand shaker, Adon Amira.There are several types of shitty handshakes that fail to convey happiness in meeting a new person.

1. The limp handshake

2. The over shaker

3. The medieval handshake (over the wrists)

4. The crusher

5. The limp over shaker

6. The crush over shaker

7. Fingertips only

These result in an awkward experience for the confident hand shaker. We go in for a single firm shake only to be met by one of these above listed failures.

1. Limp+confident= feeling as though you should be sorry for being happy and eager to make their acquaintance.

2. Over+confident=confusion as to why we are shaking hands for so long.

3. Medieval+confident=what the fuck just happened there? That guy shook my wrist!

4. Crusher+confident=I’ll just crush your hand back, didn't know it was a dominance contest

5. The limp over shaker+confident=sorry to hurt your hand but why won't you let go?

6.crusher over shaker+confident=crush war!

7. Fingertips+confident= what the fuck? I had no intention of kissing your hand if that's what

you thought!

One firm shake will suffice
thank you.